


A Meeting in Oakland

by apollo1832



Series: A Meeting in Three Parts [1]
Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, M/M, all the trigger warnings because it is andrew and neil, basically andrew and neil meet prior to canon, but they will end up in college
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2017-07-18
Packaged: 2018-11-28 17:06:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 18,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11422386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apollo1832/pseuds/apollo1832
Summary: Years before Neil Josten became a Fox he was Alex Lewis, a new student at Oakland High School where he meets and befriends Andrew Doe. This is the story of how Andrew and Neil meet before ever stepping foot in Palmetto.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, I originally posted this fic earlier this week under the name 'A Meeting in Three Parts', but decided I wasn't too happy with it. So this is that, but changed and messed around a bit. I figured it would be easier to just make this a new work and deleted the other one!  
> This is un-beta'd so any and all mistakes are completely my own! This is also based on the headcanon I posted on my tumblr @greenrobinhood!  
> Anyway! ENJOY!

Alex Lewis, age 16. Born and raised in San Jose, California before moving to Oakland because his mother Caroline got a better job close by in San Francisco.

The details of his new life had been on a loop in his head since they decided to stick to Oakland for the next few months to recuperate from being in Germany the past year and France before that. The plan was the stay until November in order to heal and rest up. They had barely made it out the last confrontation a few months ago alive, which had resulted in Alex-then Chris-being shot in the shoulder and his mother taking a knife to the gut. His mother was understandably pissed that they had to stay in one place for so long, but they both needed the time to heal and plan out what they would do next.

 It had been 6 years since his mother had taken him in the middle of the night from his father’s house, stole 5 million, and began their new lives on the run. After 6 years of running Alex was used to this song and dance of getting to a new place, having a new story, new name, new hair color new eye color, new everything. He was tired of this. All Alex wanted to do was be a normal 16 year old kid, but it had been drilled into his head by his mother that to stop running was to be killed.

Alex was about to begin the short walk to school from the little apartment his mother rented when he heard,

“Remember Abram,” his mother said, gripping his shoulder hard to bruise, “Keep your head down. Do not make friends, and only speak when spoken to. Understood?”

It wasn’t a question, but Alex knew that he had to answer.

                “Yes.” 

\--

Alex always hated starting at a new school. People would always ask him questions, always trying to get information out of him and he never understood why. It was always like they were interrogating him, and he didn’t know why. _Hopefully_ , Alex thought, _people will leave me alone here._

Alex made it to Oakland High School just in time to slip into his first class and take a seat in the back right before the bell rang to begin the day. Naively, he thought that since the bell had rang and class was supposed to start any minute, the girl with long brown hair seated in front of him turned around when he sat down. Alex hoped that she wouldn’t try to start a conversation with him. He was wrong.

“Hi! I’m Rebecca, but you can call me Becca. Are you new here? I’ve never seen you around before,” the girl-Rebecca-said.

“I think you just answered your own question,” Alex replied, hoping that she wouldn’t keep trying to talk to him.

“Well,” she said, not the slightest bit put off by his attitude, “if you need anything just let me know! I know pretty much everyone here so I can show you around if you want.” She kept staring at him, waiting for him to respond.

Alex just stared straight ahead, not bothering to reply.

“Hello? I’m talking to you,” Rebecca said, now reaching towards him.

Alex flinched, not much, but enough that the blonde guy sitting next to him noticed and grabbed Rebecca’s wrist before she could touch Alex.

“Hey, don’t touch him,” the guy said.

                “Jesus Doe, let go of me. I was just being nice,” Becca said.

Doe let go of Becca’s wrist and Alex saw that he must have had a strong grip because her wrist was already red. Doe just stared at Becca until she turned around with a muttered, “Fucking psycho.”

Alex was about to ask the guy what just happened but the glare Doe sent his way showed he wouldn’t welcome further conversation.

When the bell rang and the teacher took attendance Alex learned that the blonde guy was called Andrew Doe. Alex spent most of the remaining 50 minutes of class observing Andrew trying to figure out why a stranger would help him with something as small as a girl trying to grab him. As class dragged on Alex noticed took the time to observe his ‘saviour’, if he could call it that. Andrew didn’t look like much, being short and blond, barely 4’10”. Alex had a quiet moment of glee when he realized that this must mean that he wasn't the shortest in the room anymore. At 5’0” even Alex wasn’t taller than anyone, but he could tell he was definitely taller than Andrew, although Andrew did have more-a lot more-muscle than Alex. Alex did feel Andrew’s eyes on him occasionally for the rest of class, but decided not to do anything because it wasn’t anything Alex wasn’t doing right back.

When the bell signaled the end of class Andrew was the first one out of the door and Alex decided to avoid Andrew as best he could, remembering his mother’s voice in his head telling him,

“ _Don’t make friends. Don't ask questions. Keep your head down. Attachments could get us killed. Avoid detection at all costs."_


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's Andrew's pov!   
> I think I'm going to go back and forth between Andrew and Neil, so there will be some overlap between chapters but yeah. Anyway, feel free to leave kudos &/or comments!   
> Enjoy!

Andrew had been tossed from one foster home to the next growing up, all worse than the last. At first the foster parents he was placed with just ignored, more interested in claiming the check from the state for ‘taking care’ of him. Then they got mean, hitting and beating him for some made up transgression they swore a smaller than average 5 year old was capable of. It wasn’t until he was 7 that things got darker. It was then that he realized monsters were real, and they wore the disguise of men with too bright smiles.

He had withdrawn into himself, simply not caring anymore. As if they couldn’t touch _him_ if he chose not to care anymore. He thought the sooner one of them killed him, the better.

A few months ago however, he was placed with Cass Spear and her husband. At first he thought they were going to be the same as all the rest, but he had been there all summer and they hadn’t done anything. Cass was all smiles and she respected his privacy and never raised her voice to him, even if he ignored her for days on end. She was genuinely nice, was the conclusion Andrew had come up with. Even her husband wasn’t so bad. Cass was a stay at home mom and her husband Richard worked most of time at some accounting firm, but even when he was home he always had a nice thing to say to Andrew and always invited him to watch T.V. with him and Cass after dinner.

He knew that they had a real son, Drake, Cass had told him when he first moved in. But apparently he was on a camping trip all summer with his friends since he had just graduated high school, and was planning on enlisting in the Army in a few months.

Even though the Spears did have a _real_ son, they treated Andrew as if he was one of their own. The past few months they had gotten Andrew anything they could think of to make sure he was comfortable. They had given him a brand new bedroom set for the room they had declared was his. Richard had even taken him to get contacts and a new pair of glasses when he realized, after seeing Andrew squint at everything, that he hadn’t gotten a new prescription in years. At first Andrew thought they were being extra nice to him _because_ of what they would do to him later. That they wanted to lull him into a false sense of security. But after the first month with them had passed, Andrew realized that these were genuinely nice _real_ people, who were being nice because that’s what nice people did.

As summer drew to a close Andrew could begin to feel himself hope for the first time in a long time. Just yesterday he had heard Cass and Richard talking about the possibility of them adopting him, and he found he _wanted_ for the first time in a long time.

He wanted to have a family who cared about him. Where he have a real home to come home to after school to parents who cared about _him_ , unconditionally. For someone who grew up with a last name like Doe, who had no idea where he had even come from, it was all he could have ever wanted.  

-

On the first day of school Andrew was woken up by Cass quietly opening up his door and saying, “Andrew, sweetheart. It’s time to get up. It’s you first day back at school!”

That was another thing that had changed for Andrew since coming to live with the Spears. He could sleep through the night without waking up at every little bump in the night. He felt safe enough to sleep, so much that instead of waking up at the crack of dawn, Cass had to wake him up. It was surreal.

Andrew made some vague sound that Cass understood to mean that he was getting up. Once she left he threw back the covers and got dressed in his usual black jeans and black long sleeved shirt. After brushing his teeth and getting his bed head in order, he made his way downstairs where he saw that Cass had gone out of her way to make him homemade chocolate pancakes with a side of bacon. When he expressed his thanks to Cass she just said,

                “Oh you hush now. It’s my job to take care of you, and that means making you your favorite breakfast.”

Andrew could feel his throat start to close up, and not knowing what to say, he just nodded and dropped into the seat across from her at the table. He then drowned his pancakes and bacon in syrup before shoving them into his mouth.

He never knew what to say when Cass was so kind to him. It had been months and, while he was starting to adjust, he knew he could never express just how much it meant to him.  

When they had finished their breakfast Andrew grabbed their plates from the table so he could rise them and stick them in the dishwasher.

“Oh, Andrew. You don’t have to do that,” Cass said gesturing to the plates, “I can do it later.”

Andrew shook his head, determined to do this small thing to show Cass that he did care. He wanted to prove to her, and to himself, that he could be worthy of the love Cass had shown him. He couldn’t say it, but he could damn well show it in his actions. Cass must have realized that Andrew was going to do it anyway because she just smiled sweetly at him and told him, “Thank you.”

After Andrew had put the dished into the dishwasher he washed his hands and saw that he had about 5 minutes before he had to leave otherwise he would be late to school. As he quickly shoved his feet into the new shoes that Richard had bought him and picked up his school bag from next to the couch, Cass called out to him,

                “Oh Andrew before you go I wanted to let you know that Drake is coming home in a few weeks,” she paused as if trying to figure out how to word what she wanted to say, “Now, I know you’re a man of few words and, well, hesitant around new people, but I really hope you can give Drake a chance. I really think you two would get along wonderfully.”

Andrew didn’t really know how he felt about Drake. From what Cass and Richard had told him, Drake was an all-around good guy, who got good grades and had a lot of friends. In all the other homes he had been placed in he had never even bothered to remember the names of the other foster kids, because he knew he wouldn’t be there long anyway. But now, now Andrew had a place that he _wanted_ to keep. He wanted to stay here and if that meant getting along with the Spear’s son, then he would do just that. From what he could tell, from he had seen in Cass’s face whenever she talked about Drake, it was obvious that they adored Drake.

Andrew nodded at Cass and said, “Okay.”

Cass hadn’t really been expecting Andrew to say anything because at that she smiled brightly at him and hugged him. At first Andrew was tense, not used to other people touching him unless it was to hurt him. After a few seconds Andrew relaxed and Cass hugged him tighter. When she released him he smiled slightly, not much, but enough that when Cass saw it her eyes just got that much brighter.

As Andrew was rushing out the door he heard Cass call out, “Have a good day at school Andrew! And try to make some friends!”

Andrew knew the odds of him ever making a friend were zero to none, but he couldn’t help the blossom of warmth that spread through his chest at Cass’s words. It was something that a real mom to say to their kid on the first day of school.

On his way to school Andrew decided that he was actually going to try and put some effort into his schoolwork this year. He had been at Oakland high since his freshman year since the system thought to only put him with families in the area. In the two years previous, the only reason he had been able to pass any of his classes was due to his memory, and he did have some altercations his first year, due to some of the seniors thinking they could pick on him since he was so small, which led to him having a, sort of, reputation at the school as someone to go out of the way to avoid, someone to be afraid of. But this year, he wanted to be someone Cass could be proud of, someone that deserved a loving home and would be allowed to stay with her. He made a silent promise to himself that he would keep out of trouble.

-

Andrew had already memorized his schedule for the year last week when they were released, so he knew that he had American History for his first period. He got to class about 10 minutes early and took his seat in the back corner. As he waited for class to start he noticed some people he was aware of from his last few years at the school. He saw Rebecca Carson, a girl with long black hair, who laughed a lot and chewed her gum too loud, took the seat close to Andrew. Andrew didn’t like her, but she had proven so far to be more bark than bite, so he also didn’t care.

As the class was starting to fill up, Andrew found himself staring out into space just waiting for class to start. That is, until he saw a kid he had never seen before take the seat next to him. Andrew turned slightly to look at him and found that Rebecca had the same idea because she was introducing herself to him. Not bothering to listen to her Andrew took the time to look at the new kid. It was no wonder that Rebecca would take the time to talk to him. The kid had dark blonde hair, green eyes, and tanned skin. Andrew took in his face and saw a faint scar running over his eyebrow, and he noticed the kids lean body, _‘probably a runner then’_ Andrew thought. He didn’t realize he was staring until he heard the kid tell Rebecca,

                “I think you just answered your own question,” in response to her asking if he was new since she had never seen him before. Andrew silently laughed at the gobsmacked look on Rebecca’s face, because no doubt nobody had ever written her off so completely before. It wasn’t until Andrew saw that the tense way the kid was sitting, as if he was moments away from bolting out of his seat that Andrew knew he really didn’t want to continue talking to Rebecca. Now, normally, Andrew wouldn’t ever get involved, but the way the kid flinched when Rebecca went to make a grab for him that Andrew knew he would be getting involved.

Andrew grabbed Rebecca’s wrist before she could touch the kid and said, “Hey, don’t touch him,” while making sure the squeeze her wrist, hopefully enough to leave a bruise.

                “Jesus Doe, let go of me. I was just being nice,” Rebecca said, pleading with Andrew. Andrew mentally scoffed, as if being nice was an excuse for touching someone against their will. Andrew had a lot of experience with those types of people.

Before he could think on that anymore, Andrew let go of her wrist and saw her cradle it to her body, turning away with a muttered, “fucking psycho.”

Andrew had been called worse, a lot worse, so it barely registered. He then saw the kid stare at him with an unreadable look on his face, but when he opened his mouth as if to talk to Andrew, Andrew shot him a glare, making it clear that he should keep his mouth shut.

The kid decided against saying anything, but Andrew did notice the guy kept peeking at Andrew out of the corner of his eye.

When the bell, finally, rang to signal the start of class and the teacher called out attendance Andrew learned that the kids name was Alex Lewis.

As the teacher went over the syllabus for the semester Andrew found himself observing Alex. He quickly came to the conclusion that the kid was way too high strung, if the way he sat, straight-backed and tense, was any indication. The kid also spent a lot of class time alternating between trying to sneak looks at Andrew-as if Andrew couldn’t tell-and looking at the door as if waiting for something to happen. He didn’t know what to think of the new kid. Andrew did notice that the kid was short, barely an inch taller than Andrew himself. But as class was beginning to end Andrew decided that the kid was interesting and he found himself wanting to reach out and talk to him, maybe learn all his secrets. Which, what? Since when did Andrew want to, what, make friends? With some kid he had never met?

Andrew swore this was Cass’s doing. Andrew would have never paid attention to another kid his age, even one as cute as Alex before Cass. But Andrew had found himself thawing out the more time he spent with Cass.

When the bell finally rang to signal the end of class, Andrew shot out of his seat and was the first one out of the door. Andrew decided that he would need more information on Alex. Why? Who knows, but the fact that he wanted it had given Andrew pause. He decided that he would just observe him for now, because what’s the harm in that? With that in mind Andrew walked to his next period thinking, _‘this should be an interesting year’_.


	3. Chapter 3

The rest of the school week, went, well how you would expect the first week of school to go. Boring and slow. Alex got a few looks throughout the first week, but with one glare people tended to back off and learned to leave him alone.  

Every day after school Alex went straight home to the apartment that his mother, Caroline Lewis now, was renting. The apartment was, pretty shitty to be honest, and in an even worse neighborhood. Alex found that it tended to be easier for them to live in bad neighborhoods because people tended to mind their own business. The apartment itself had creaky floors-which was actually good for alerting them if they had intruders-1 bedroom that Alex and Caroline shared, water stains on the ceiling and stains on the walls of dubious origin that Alex wasn’t even going to try to guess where they were from.

But despite it being a pretty horrible place to live, Alex and his mother had lived in a lot worse. The only thing they really needed was a roof over their head and someplace to rest. After being on the run from his father and his men for almost 6 years, it was nice to have a place to rest, at least for a little while.

Before Oakland, Alex was living in Germany, and before that they were in France. He had always wondered how his mother got them in and out of countries undetected, but at this point he learned not to ask questions. The last time he tried to ask his mother why they were still running-after not having seen any of his father’s men for a few months-he wound up with a few cracked ribs and a black eye. After that he learned he was better of not asking questions. Especially when days after had been when Jackson Plank had finally caught up with them and shot him. They had barely made it out of that confrontation alive.

 

 

While they had been hashing out the details of their new lives Caroline had decided that she would get a job in order to better ‘hide in plain side’. Seeing it as a good plan, and knowing she wouldn’t appreciate it if he questioned it Alex just went along with it. It was all a part of the illusion that she was a single mom working to take care of her only son and be able to pay the bills. It was a story that most people bought, a story common enough that nobody bothered to question it, but not too outrageous that it brought unwanted attention.

Alex was usually really good at staying in the background and blending in, at being someone that people forgot and looked over. It was what had kept him alive all this time. But as the days went on, he realized that there was one person who noticed him.

\---

Before he knew it, a month had gone by. A month since Alex and his mother had arrived in Oakland. A month since he ‘met’ Andrew Doe. Despite the fact that Andrew spent a good amount of time just watching him, Alex could feel himself starting to get comfortable. Surprisingly, more often than not Alex found himself watching Andrew right back.

He felt like a normal 15 year high school kid. If said 15 year old kid was playing at being a 16 year old with dyed hair and colored contacts and living under a false name that is.

\---

It was during the first week of school that Alex noticed he shared almost all of his classes with Andrew. On the surface, Andrew didn’t look like much. He was blond and short, even shorter than Alex’s 5’1. He didn’t even think Andrew was over 5 foot yet. But Alex had learned that appearances could be deceiving and he decided that he wouldn’t underestimate Andrew, especially when he noticed that Andrew stared at him throughout most of their shared classes.

Once during English Alex felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up and when he turned around he caught Andrew staring straight at him and instead of looking away, like most people would after getting caught staring, Andrew just lifted an eyebrow, daring Alex to do something. In a huff, Alex turned back around and tried to listen to the teacher drone on about Catcher in the Rye, but found himself distracted by thoughts of Andrew. Andrew was unlike anyone Alex had ever encountered before. The only reason that Alex could come up with for why Andrew seemed to keep his eyes on him wherever he went, was that Andrew wanted something. But for the life of him, Alex could not think of what Andrew could possibly want him for.  

\--

After English, Alex had his lunch period, which he took to spending on the roof of the school in order to avoid the large crowds in the cafeteria. The door leading up to the roof _was_ locked, but Alex had yet to meet a lock he couldn’t crack. And it’s not like the school went to much trouble trying to keep the door shut, if the cheap padlock as the only lock was an indication.

After a month of sneaking up to the roof for his lunch period he thought that he was in the clear for breaking the lock, thinking that nobody else could possibly know. But today Alex saw that, standing close to the edge was unmistakably Andrew Doe. Alex froze once he saw that someone, anyone was actually up here, but before he could make a hasty retreat Andrew turned and told Alex,

“Leave or close the door,” and then turned away. As if he decided that Alex wasn’t a threat. Alex didn’t know how to react.

Alex weighed his options but decided to close the door and stay up on the roof with Andrew. Andrew was an enigma. The two boys had barely spoken two words to each other since Alex came to Oakland, but they both knew the other was watching. It was a stalemate at this point, each party waiting for the other to make the first move. Alex decided to just get it over with.

“Are you planning on jumping?” Alex asked, wondering if that was why Andrew was standing so close to the edge of the building, “Because if you are, I doubt the fall would actually kill you. It’s barely two stories, you’d survive, probably just break a leg or something.”

It seemed as if that wasn’t what Andrew was expecting, and caught off guard he huffed out a small laugh and turned back around to face Alex stating, “You’re so weird.”

Alex didn’t know if he should be offended or not so he just kept quiet. Andrew didn’t seem bothered though. He turned and sat down next to the edge of the building, signaling for Alex to join him. When Alex sat down next to him, Andrew offered him one of the cigarettes he had taken out of his pocket and after a moment’s deliberation Alex took it. Andrew lit both of their cigarettes and they smoked in silence for a few minutes.

                “So, what’s your deal?” Andrew asked, after they had smoked half of their cigarettes.

                “My deal?”

                “Yeah, your deal. You’re skittish. You don’t like crowds, or being surrounded by people. You wear colored contacts and dye your hair. And your clothes-,“ Andrew looked the offending clothes and sneered.

                “What about my clothes?” Alex knew he should be terrified that someone had seen through him so easily, but he found he was enjoying this-being known.

                “They’re fucking awful. It physically hurts to look at you.”

Alex laughed at that, because Andrew did have a point. His clothes _were_ awful. But they were designed to blend in. Nobody looked twice at the kid who looked homeless. But it’s not like he could tell Andrew that so he just said,

                “Well, you’re not wrong.”

It seemed that Andrew had nothing to say to that, so Alex decided to ask, “How’d you know about the contacts?”

The contacts his mom got them each time they changed identity were top of the line. Nobody had ever called him out on it before.

“You were blinking like a dumbass the other day in German, figured one of your contacts was bothering you, and-,” Andrew paused, “the green looks too perfect to be real.”

Again, Alex laughed, because _of course_. Alex remembered when he had gotten a piece of eyelash stuck in his eye the other day in German and spent a good 10 minutes trying to discreetly get it out without disturbing his contact. It figures that Andrew saw him.

They both took a moment before continuing smoking in silence.

                “What about you?” Alex asked, breaking the silence.

                Blank faced Andrew replied, “What about me?”

                “What’s your deal? Why’ve you been watching me?”

                “You’re much more interesting than class,” Andrew responded, before flicking his cigarette off the roof and heading back inside.

Alex had no idea what Andrew had meant by that and spent the remaining time before lunch was over to turn it over in his head. Then he smiled when he realized that that was the longest conversation he’s had with someone, besides his mother, in years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> up next: Andrew's point of view of this chapter, basically. Honestly, the next few chapters will have a lot overlap since I want to show how the boys react to one another. but, next chapter should be up soon!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> honest to god one of the hardest things about writing this is having to call Neil Alex. literally everytime i go to write his name I write neil, But neil doesnt exist yet!!!!  
> ANYWAY, heres some Andrew lowkey stalking and crushing on our boy neil, alex, whatever.  
> & as always, any and all mistakes are mine. I tend to slam out each chapter in one go so if you notice anything blatantly wrong leave a comment and let me know!! I am the Queen of never proofreading, but ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Andrew spent the rest of the week watching Alex. He found that they shared most of their classes together-with the exception of study hall, so it wasn’t exactly _hard_ to keep an eye on him. Andrew noticed that whenever someone would try to talk to Alex, Alex would just glare at them until they got uncomfortable and gave up. Andrew could appreciate that. Although he did get a kick out of watching blushing girls-and on one occasion a freshman boy-walk up to Alex and flirt with him, only for Alex to just stare blankly at them as if wondering what they hell they were still doing talking to him.

Alex was problematic. Well, not exactly, what was problematic for Andrew was his own interest in him. At this point Andrew could tell it wasn’t just because he found him attractive, but because there was something different about Alex that Andrew just, for the life of him couldn’t put his finger on.

\--

Every day, after school, Cass would be waiting for Andrew in the kitchen with a giant mug of his absolute favorite hot chocolate. He didn’t even know _how_ she had found out it was his favorite, but it wasn’t like his obscene sweet tooth was a secret after having lived with her for 4 months.

It became like their tradition. Cass would wake Andrew up for school and have his breakfast waiting for him on the dining room table, they would eat breakfast together, and occasionally Richard would join them if he hadn’t already left for work. Cass wouldn’t push him to talk and instead told him about funny things she had seen throughout the week or something she had heard on the news. She would always send him on his way with a “Have a good day Andrew!”

Then when he got home from school Cass would be waiting for him in the kitchen, where they would drink their hot chocolate and Cass would regale him with silly stories about the neighbors or her friends.

And Andrew was content. He was happy. It was something he hadn’t felt, well ever.

\--

When Andrew got to school he would inevitably get distracted by Alex. The more he paid attention to Alex, the less Alex made sense. On the outside Alex looked, well tried to look, like someone would could easily blend into the background. Andrew thought this was impossible for someone with that face and that body, but from what he’d seen so far Alex also wasn’t remotely interested in anyone.

 

Although there was the one memorable moment when Andrew saw Alex get completely distracted by one of the Exy players. For a second Andrew thought Alex was staring lovingly at the guy, only to be disappointed when he realized Alex was looking at the stickball racket in the guy’s hand. He hadn’t pegged Alex as a big sports guy or a jock, but he wasn’t about to judge. Well that’s a lie, he was totally judging Alex for his taste in sports. Because most sport were dumb, but Exy was just ridiculous. It was a bastard sport invented barely 30 years ago but had randomly grown so popular around the world that they had just made it an Olympic sport a few years ago.  It made no sense to Andrew though.

Another moment that didn’t make sense to Andrew was when he had figured out that Alex wore colored contacts. The contacts were incredibly good, and it wouldn’t even have registered to him if he hadn’t seen Alex blinking rapidly and tearing up in class the other day. But when he realized that Alex wore contacts it wasn’t long until he also realized that the color was also a little _too_ perfect. It was just this side of too green.

And he dyed his hair. Again, it was done perfectly, with no roots showing, so Andrew wouldn’t have known to even look for signs of it until the he found out about the contacts. Alex’s hair was dyed a dark blonde, a few shades darker than Andrew’s own, but his eyebrows were also a weird red color that did not match his hair, at all.  And there was that thing where no matter where or when Andrew saw him, Alex was always, without fail, clutching his duffle bag, as if his world started and ended with the contents of that bag. Once he knew what to look for he came to the conclusion that not much of Alex was real.

So, the more time Andrew spent dissecting Alex’s appearance, the more time he spent trying to add up all the misshapen pieces. No matter what conclusion Andrew came too, none of them made any sense.

\---

It had been almost a month since the start of classes and Andrew had laid eyes on Alex, and he was still as confused as he was in the beginning. They didn’t speak to each other, but they were aware of one another. During English, while the teacher was droning on and on about his boner for Catcher in the Rye-a stupid book in Andrew’s opinion-Alex had catch Andrew staring at him. Andrew had been, admittedly a bit flustered when Alex caught him but fought against the blush that had threatened to spread across his face and just quirked his eyebrow at Alex as if to say, “ _Well?”_

In response, Alex had just turned away in a huff and Andrew had counted it as a win.

Since the two boys shared a majority of classes together-with the exception of study hall right before lunch-Andrew was confused when he found that he had never seen Alex eat in the cafeteria during lunch. So, because Andrew had decided on this one-man crusade to figure out the puzzle that was Alex Lewis, he decided to figure out where Alex went during lunch.

\---

Andrew had dipped out of his last period early in order to find out where Alex went during their lunch period. It didn’t take very long at all.

The roof. Because _of fucking course_ it was the roof. The one place that Andrew absolutely hated, because he had never gotten the hang of heights.  

Andrew decided to go over to the edge to see how far down the drop would be, and he had just looked down when he heard someone open the door behind him. Andrew had to calm his erratic breathing before he called out,

                “Leave or close the door,” and then promptly turned around so Alex wouldn’t see that his face was still flushed from being so high up.

Alex was quiet for so long that Andrew thought he had gone but then he heard him confidently call out,

                “Are you planning on jumping? Because if you were, I doubt the fall would actually kill you. It’s barely two stories, you’d survive, probably just break a leg or something.”

 _What. The. Fuck._ That was the last thing Andrew had expected him to say, and it made him huff out a laugh. He couldn’t believe him. For lack of something better to say Andrew just told him, “You’re so weird,” before sitting down and gestured for Alex to join him.

Andrew then offered Alex one of his cigarettes, a habit that he had yet to tell Cass about. He knew he should quit, knowing it just got harder to quit once you’ve been smoking long enough. But Andrew had started when he was 12 years old and he had stolen his foster dad’s cigarettes off the living room table. He saw no reason to quit yet. Alex took the offering and Andrew leaned over to light it after Alex had already put it in his mouth, staring him down as he did so. Alex didn’t react except to take a puff once it was lit.

                “So, what’s your deal?” Andrew finally asked, after they had gotten halfway through their cigarettes.

                “My deal?” Alex responded, looking at Andrew, confused.

                “Yeah, your deal,” Andrew elaborated as if Alex was dumb, “You’re skittish. You don’t like crowds, or being surrounded by people. You wear colored contacts and dye your hair. And your clothes-”, Andrew couldn’t even begin with the clothes, settling for giving them a dirty look.

                “What about my clothes?”

                “They’re fucking awful. It physically hurts to look at you.”

At that, Alex caught Andrew off guard, once again, by laughing, his eyes sparkling with mirth.  

                “Well, you’re not wrong,” he said once he stopped laughing.

Then when Alex asked him how he knew about the contacts Andrew told him about how he caught him blinking like a dumbass the other day, and again, Alex laughed as if he was having a grand old time with Andrew.

Andrew had no idea how to handle this. When Alex laughed his entire face lit up in a way that Andrew had never seen before. He had barely had time to think just how _pretty_ and _disarming_ Alex was before Alex said,

                “What about you?”

                “What about me?” Andrew asked, because this entire conversation just showed how out of his depth Andrew was in dealing with someone like Alex.

                “What’s your deal? Why’ve you been watching me?”

                “You’re much more interesting than class,” Andrew responded, before flicking his cigarette off the roof and heading back inside where things made a bit more sense. Where boys who tried so hard to blend in didn’t call out Andrew or leave him feeling flustered and shaking all over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> up next: Andrew and Alex get closer, and Drake appears.  
> also, updates will 100% be sporadic since I will never be able to keep to aNY kind of deadline. but i should, maybe, update more often on the weekends since I only have class mon-thurs


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, any and all mistake are mine since i will always be the goblin and refuse to do more than a cursory look over my work, whoops! i never know what to say in these, but enjoy! and let me know what you think in the comments! or leave kudos <3

When Andrew got home from school he perched himself on the stool at the kitchen table where Cass had been waiting for him with their usual hot chocolate. As usual he didn’t say anything but Cass must have noticed that he was lost in thought.

                “Anything happen at school today?”

Andrew just shrugged, not wanting to tell her about Alex. He was going over everything that had happened and he was just, confused. He was never confused. It was frustrating, _Alex_ was frustrating. 

They continued drinking their hot chocolate in silence when Cass said, “Oh, and don’t forget, Drake’s coming home on Friday, so less than 3 days! And we’re all going to have a nice family meal together!”

Cass had been going on and on about how excited she was to have Drake home for the next few months before he shipped out with the Army, so Andrew was aware that he’d be arriving tomorrow. He still didn’t know how he felt about it but was willing to give it a try for Cass’s sake.

Andrew zoned out as Cass went on about how he was going to make all of Drake’s favorite foods for dinner when he finally came home.

                “And I’m going to try this new recipe for double chocolate fudge caramel brownies for dessert.”

Now Andrew was interested, and by the raised eyebrow that Cass gave him she knew.

                “Thought you’d like that! You are going to love them!” she gave a short pause before continuing, looking directly at Andrew, “Would you like to help me make them?”

Quietly, Andrew said, “yeah, okay.” Cass smiled brightly and nodded, obviously pleased that Andrew had verbally agreed to spend more time with her. Andrew was grateful that she didn’t make a big deal out of it. Not knowing what else to say Andrew drained the rest of his drink and put his mug in the sink to deal with later. With a nod to Cass he grabbed his schoolbag and continued to his room to get started on his homework.

Andrew then took out one of his various assignments and settled in at his desk to work for the rest of the night, thinking about how much he liked living with Cass and how he wouldn’t want to give this live up for the world.

\---

When Andrew woke up the next morning himself consumed with thoughts Drake’s impending arrival. He knew that Cass and Richard loved their son, a lot. If he couldn’t learn to live with Drake then there wasn’t a doubt in Andrew’s mind that they would take their sons side over his, no matter how much Cass had said she cared for him. He silently promised himself then that he would do whatever it takes to get along with Drake, for Cass’s sake.

Andrew went through his usual morning routine and on his way to school he let his thoughts wander back to Alex. He still didn’t know how he was going to proceed with, well, _talking_ to Alex. He didn’t know _how_ to talk to people. The only person who had ever made an effort to talk to him was Cass, and he still didn’t know how to talk to her for longer than a few minutes at a time. _Whatever,_ he thought as he transferred his books from his locker to his bag and slammed the locker shut, placing the lock back on, and walking to his first period.

When Andrew walked into his first class of the day, he immediately took his usual seat in the back and was then followed by Alex, who claimed the seat directly next to Andrew. In the past month Alex took care to sit further away from Andrew, but it seemed that he had decided to give that up.

Andrew just stared at Alex, not wanting to be the first to break the silence, but then Alex surprised him by nodding to him and saying, ”Hey.” At this Andrew just nodded in response and it seemed that Alex didn’t expect him to say anything else, because he just smiled and looked towards the front of the class where the teacher was setting up for the days lesson.

\--

For the rest of the morning Alex had decided to take to being Andrew’s shadow. Not talking, just keeping silent company, as if he didn’t know what to say but still found Andrew’s company comforting none the less.

Andrew could relate.

It wasn’t until they separated right before their lunch period that Andrew let himself dwell on the fact that it seemed like Alex didn’t even want anything from Andrew other than his, what, company?

When lunch did finally roll around, Andrew decided to go back to the roof, where Alex was already waiting, sitting near the edge eating a banana. When he heard the door open, he jumped a bit, but when he saw it was Andrew he just smiled slightly and motioned for Andrew to sit with him.

Andrew still had no idea what to make of Alex. He was jumpy and obviously nervous around people, but he didn’t seem that way around Andrew? Even though they had barely had their first conversation yesterday. Andrew found he didn’t have it in him to question it too deeply so he just shrugged and sat next to Alex.

Cass always gave Andrew money to buy lunch ever since he told her not to bother making him a bagged lunch, so he always used that money to buy a bunch of candy from the vending machine in the morning. He took out one of the Snickers he had and started eating it.

Andrew was just starting his second chocolate bar when Alex said, “If you keep eating all that junk, you’re going to get fat.”

                “Rude.”

Alex just smirked, not looking the least bit sorry before offering up a granola bar that he had dug out of his giant, ever present, duffle.

Andrew gave the granola the dirtiest look he could muster because, “Those are disgusting.” Alex didn’t look bothered though, instead eating the granola himself.

They fell into another bout of silence, which seemed to be par for the course for the two of them. But instead of being uncomfortable by it, Andrew found himself relaxing.

Alex was leaning back on his elbows watching the clouds when Andrew lit one of the cigarettes from his bag. Not wanting to dig through his bag for another one, Andrew offered Alex a puff of his when he saw him look at him. Alex took the offered cigarette, and seemed to just breathe in the smoke before handing it back to Andrew. At Andrew’s look, Alex shyly said, “I don’t really smoke, I just like the smell.” At this Andrew just nodded.

“What would you do if there was an apocalypse?” Andrew asked after they sat in silence for a bit longer. He knew it was probably a weird, out of the blue, question, but it had been on his mind since he picked up _The Road_ by Cormac McCarthy the other day.

Alex didn’t seem to mind because he immediately started going into what he would do, laying out a full blown plan that was incredibly well thought-out which left Andrew impressed and a bit freaked out, if he was honest.

The only people who had that kind of plan to run away in that much detail, already had a lot of experience in running. Which, honestly, explained a lot about Alex. _Of course he’s a runaway_. _Or maybe he’s in Witness Protection?_ Andrew couldn’t decide between the two at this point.

It wasn’t until Alex looked at Andrew expectantly that he realized Alex had asked him what he would do in the same situation.

                “I’d find a place with food, water, and weapons to hole up. Then shot anyone who tried to come near me.”

Alex nodded as if that was a good idea. Then he seemed to be debating something to himself before he asked, “Why is your last name Doe?”

Andrew froze, but before Alex could backtrack what he said he said, “I’m a foster kid. I was dropped off when I was just a baby and the woman who did, didn’t give her name, first or last. So now I’m Doe,” Andrew gave a rueful smile, “like an unidentified body, get it?”

Andrew was actually shocked at himself for speaking so much, let alone telling Alex all that. Alex however, didn’t seem fazed and just accepted it without question.

Since the two had the same classes for the rest of the day after lunch, Alex took to following Andrew around again, sitting next to him in every class, as if to say, ‘ _I’m your friend now, deal with it.’_ And Andrew couldn’t find it in himself to mind. He had never had a real friend before, and judging by the way Alex was acting, neither had he.

\---

The next 3 days passed much the same. Andrew would continue his daily routine with Cass, with Richard occasionally joining them for breakfast or dinner. When he got to school, Alex would already be waiting in class for him, always perking up when Andrew walked in, they would spend the day basically attached at the hip, and smoke cigarettes on the roof during lunch. Alex had even started making faces at Andrew whenever he got bored during class, and whenever he got the slightest reaction out of him Alex’s face would light up, as if getting the slightest reaction out of Andrew was the best part of his day.

Whenever Alex wasn’t looking, Andrew would take the time to observe him. Staring at his jaw and throat, and the lean muscle of his thighs, and the only thought going through his head at the time was, ‘ _Jesus fuck, I am so fucking gay.’_ Which, while true, was also troubling because from what he’d seen so far, Alex had shown no sexual or romantic interest in anyone since coming to Oakland-his boner for Exy notwithstanding.

For the first time in his life Andrew found himself, well, happy with the way things were going. He had finally found a home that he wanted to keep. He had actually made a friend, someone that was interesting and seemed to respect him. It was weird, but Andrew found he liked it.

When Friday finally rolled around Cass was in a tizzy, making sure everything was clean and she had everything ready to make dinner and dessert that night. Cass had offered to drive Andrew to school that morning since she had to pick Drake up from wherever he was-Andrew hadn’t asked where exactly he was-but turned her down because he did enjoy the quiet walk to school in the mornings.

The school day passed as it usually did, except he let out an actual laugh when Alex had leaned too far back in his seat and fell out of it. Alex had glared at him before laughing along with him while everyone in class had just stared at them like they were freaks, but Andrew couldn’t find it in himself to care what they thought.

 

By the time Andrew had gotten home he had to let himself in with his key since Cass had texted him on the phone she had gotten him a few months ago, that she had taken Drake out shopping for some new shoes, since he had ruined his camping, and asked if he needed anything. He replied in the negative and Cass told him that they should be home soon so he should wait for her so they could still have their usual after school drink together.  

Andrew let out a slight smile at that when he realized that they really did have a usual after school tradition. He still couldn’t get over just how much of his life had changed since coming to the Spears.

Andrew should have realized how dangerous it was, to finally have something worth losing. He should have known that it couldn’t, wouldn’t last, not for people like him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really thought i would get to introduce drake in this chapter, but ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯.  
> also, yes the boys are alot softer here than in canon, but thats mostly bc neil still has mary and can be a bit if a 'rebellious teen' and andrew has Cass minus drake  
> up next: another andrew pov, drake is introduced, etc,etc. after that i'll get back to another neil chapter though!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> drake is finally introduced, so ya know, trigger warnings for his entire being. i hate drake, i hate him alot, and this chapter was physically hard for me to write because of it, but since im trying to keep this as *close* to canon as possible i decided i had to keep him.  
> but anyway, enjoy!

By the time Cass walked in the door holding a mountain of groceries, Andrew had sprawled out lazily on the couch, watching old cartoons in the living room.

“Hello dear, would you be a doll and-?” Cass asked, breaking off when she saw that Andrew had already gotten up to help take some of the bags from her.

                “Thanks sweetheart. Just leave it all in the kitchen and we can unpack it in a second. Drake’s getting the rest from the car.”

Andrew nodded at this. He could tell how excited Cass was about introducing the two, he just hoped that it would go smoothly.

                “Mom, I _told_ you I could carry the rest in one trip!”

Andrew started at the loud, booming voice not used to loud noises in the house since both Cass and Richard were softer spoken.

“Yes sweetheart,” Cass told her son, rolling her eyes, “Just be careful putting everything down. We don’t want anything to break!”

Drake breezed into the kitchen, not seeing Andrew over the groceries obscuring his view. Once Drake put everything down in the kitchen Cass decided then was the best time to introduce him to Andrew.

                “Drake, this here is Andrew. Andrew, this is Drake,” Cass said gesturing between the two boys.

Drake laughed when he saw Andrew standing next to Cass, “Fuck, I almost didn’t see you all the way down there.”

Andrew didn’t bother responding because compared to Drake’s 6’3”, he suspected everyone was short. He did notice that Drake looked exactly the same as in all the pictures Cass had of him all around the house. He was tall and muscular with a chiseled jaw and dazzling smile.

Andrew didn’t like him. He could tell there was something off about him, but he couldn’t place it. Andrew decided to deal with figuring it out later and simply nodded when he noticed that Cass was looking at him, probably hoping that he wouldn’t completely write off Drake.

                “Oh, no. None of that little bro! We’re practically family, come here!” Drake said, and before Andrew could react, he swept Andrew up in a tight hug, lifting him in the air.

Scratch that, Andrew _really_ didn’t like him.

                “Now, Drake. Put him down,” Cass admonished while still trying-and failing-to hide a smile. Obviously happy that it seemed the two would get along. Andrew decided to keep letting her believe that.

When Drake put him down Andrew instantly stepped out of his reach, hoping Drake wouldn’t try to do that ever again. The guy obviously had personal space issues, and Andrew really didn’t want to stab the guy, for Cass’s sake.

                “Okay boys,” Cass said, “Now, Drake why don’t you relax and watch some TV and Andrew can help me with dinner.”

                “Since when do you let someone else help you in the kitchen, Ma?”

                “Well, unlike you dear, Andrew is a great help and doesn’t try to burn the house down,” Cass told her son, “I still don’t know how you started the fire when the only thing on the stove was water, but Andrew doesn’t have that problem, so I trust him to help me in the kitchen.”

Drake laughed, “Yeah, yeah. Alright, but to be fair, it was only one time!”

Cass smiled indulgingly at her son while Andrew just stood there awkwardly before decided to go back into the kitchen to get started on putting away the groceries.

\---

Andrew spent the next hour in the kitchen with Cass. She had set Andrew up with the recipe for the double chocolate caramel brownies while Cass had gotten started on actual dinner.

 Richard came home from work just as Cass told Drake to start setting the table for everyone. Andrew could hear Richard call out ‘ _Hello’_ to Cass before going to the dining room to greet Drake.

Andrew helped Cass bring all the food out to the dining room and everyone sat around the table before settling in to eat. As Andrew piled his plate with food he listened to Richard question Drake about his months long adventure camping around and travelling with his friends. Andrew, not wanting to take part in the conversation stared down, eating his food, and thought about what Alex was probably up to. The dinner went how, Andrew assumed, normal family dinner went. Drake entertained his parents with stories of his summer adventures camping and travelling with Richard interjecting with questions and Cass admonishing him when he told them when he did something slightly illegal.

Drake didn’t spent much of dinner paying any mind to Andrew, and for that Andrew was grateful. By this point, Cass and Richard knew that Andrew didn’t like to talk much and much preferred to stay silent.

Once dinner was over Cass and Richard retired to their room, leaving Andrew alone with Drake for the first time.

                “So, how are you liking it here so far?” Drake said awkwardly, running a hand through his hair.

Andrew didn’t bother responding, instead turning to get a book from his bag, so he could go upstairs and finish reading it for English. “Yeah, she said you didn’t talk much.” Andrew heard the older boy say. Again, Andrew didn’t bother responding.

                “Look,” Drake said, blocking the stairs before Andrew could retire to his room for the rest of the night, “Mom told me that she and Dad are thinking about officially adopting you. So, since there’s a good chance we’re going to be brothers, we should try to talk and get along, you know?”

Andrew already knew about the possible adoption, he had heard Cass and Richard whispering about it when they thought he couldn’t hear. He didn’t know how to feel about it, mostly because he didn’t think they would go through with it. But if they had told Drake, then it was more than a fleeting thought.

                “Aw fuck. I wasn’t supposed to tell you that, Ma was planning on surprising you next month. So, like, when they do tell you about it, act surprised, alright?” Drake continued smiling bashfully, “Anyway, why don’t we go up to my room and play some videogames?” When he saw that Andrew was ignoring him he said, “I promise I we don’t even have to talk!”

At this Andrew weighed his options. Either he could go along with it and make Cass proud that he was putting in an effort, or. Well, there wasn’t an or since Andrew _did_ want to make Cass proud. Drake seemed pleased when Andrew nodded his assent, motioning for Andrew to follow him.  

They played videogames for almost 2 hours before Andrew finally said, “I’m going to bed.” When he stood up to leave however, Drake gasped and exclaimed, “You talked!” and seeing the glare Andrew threw him, raised up his hands in surrender before saying, “I’m warming up to you! I can feel it! Same time tomorrow, AJ?”

At the nickname Andrew glared fiercely at Drake, no liking the look on his face when he said it, but Drake paid it no bother. Drake then smiled again when Andrew quietly said, “ok”.

_See Cass? I can get along with him._ He hoped she would be proud.

\---

Andrew spent the rest of the weekend alternating between reading whatever book he had handy, and taking Drake up on his incessant offers to play videogames, remembering Cass’s smile when she saw the two of them spending time together.

Andrew had caught Drake staring at him a few times while playing but didn’t say anything. He knew what those types of looks usually meant. But Drake was Cass’s son. There was no way Cass would have-. Andrew just hoped he was interpreting the looks wrong.

                He wasn’t.

\---

The following week passed in a blur. At school, he and Alex spent all their free time together, with Alex usually popping up out of the blue. They alternated between sitting together at lunch and between classes just enjoying each other’s company in silence to going over their plans for what they would do in the case of different scenarios-at present they were discussing an alien invasion.

So, school was good for Andrew. Everyone except Alex kept out of his way, he was getting good grades, and Alex seemed to enjoy spending time with him.

The problem was going home.

Drake had barely been home a week, but already he had wormed his way into every piece of free time Andrew spent with Cass. Andrew didn’t say anything to Cass because of the look of joy on her face whenever Drake swung an arm around Andrew’s shoulder or ruffed his hair like he was a little kid. She was probably thinking about how great it was that they were getting along.

But Andrew knew better. He had been through this before. Too many times, in too many homes. He couldn’t tell Cass though, he knew that. She would never believe him, not over her own flesh and blood. Even on the off chance she did believe him, Andrew couldn’t do that to her. It would break her heart.

So Andrew endured the lingering stares and touches, hoping that Drake would never go completely over the line. That it would stop at the looks and casual touches.

He really should have known better by now than to hope.

\---

On Friday, after everyone had gone bed, Andrew heard his bedroom door open. He froze, knowing what was to come, but wishing he was somehow mistaken.

                “Hey, AJ. You up? Oh, you are, your eyes are open. Good, that’s good. Don’t ya think we should get to know each other a little better by now little bro?” Drake said, sitting down on the edge of the bed and putting a hand on where Andrew’s leg was under the blanket, “Why don’t we have some brother bonding time, what do you say?”

 In the months since he had come to the Spears, he had come to see it as an oasis, a place of love and protection in an otherwise godforsaken world. He should have known it was merely a mirage.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> up next: getting back to neil pov!  
> also don't forget to leave kudos &/or comments to let me know what you think!! <3<3<3  
> also for a rough timeline of when everything is happening  
> September 2nd: First day of school, Andrew and Alex 'meet'  
> September 28th: Andrew and Alex talk on the roof for the first time.  
> October 10th: Drake comes home.  
> October 18th: rape happens.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> getting back to an Alex/Neil pov! my demisexual son has no idea hes hardcore crushing on andrew  
> (i did this chapter in like an hour when i was supposed to be doing my spanish homework, so if theres mistakes, thats why, whoops ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯)  
> anyway, ENJOY<3

So far, Alex had settled in nicely in Oakland. For the first time in 6 years it felt like he could have a life here. He had even made a friend, which is something that he hadn’t had in a very long time.

It was a strange feeling, to have a friend. Alex hadn’t planned on it, in fact he was sure if his mom knew he was spending so much time with someone at school she would be furious. But somehow he couldn’t muster up the energy to be bothered. He liked having someone to talk to throughout the day, someone to just share in silence with. He hadn’t had a real friend since he was 9 years old and playing Exy with his best friend Kevin Day.

Kevin Day had become Alex’s best friend from the moment they met, bonding over a mutual love of Exy as kids. Kevin had been adopted by the Moriyama’s, who were business associates of his fathers. As soon as they had met when they were little they became inseparable. Alex had loved it when his father had to go to Castle Evermore to do…whatever he had to do, because that always meant he could spend the day playing Exy with Kevin.

Even at such a young age Kevin had loved Exy, being the literal son of the Exy creator herself, and he made sure that Alex knew all the rules so they could play together. Alex had often found Kevin a little demanding on the court, but could never muster up the energy to complain, well much.

The only thing that Alex had never liked, was Riko. Riko was Kevin’s adoptive brother, and while Kevin liked him, Alex, not so much. The look on Riko’s face whenever he hit Alex a bit too hard on court reminded Alex too much of the people who worked with his father, and so he was never that comfortable with him. Alex did love it though, when he got a shot past Riko and Riko looked like he was constipated, which Alex definitely voiced, loudly and often.

But when they weren’t playing, Alex and Kevin used to sneak into one of the unused offices in the stadium in order to hide from Riko and talk about whatever it is that little kids talk about.

Before he could get too lost in his thoughts, Alex shook his head, trying to clear it of all thoughts of Kevin. He hadn’t thought about Kevin since he had moved to Oakland. He knew Kevin was probably about to start his second year at Edgar Allan and was already being scouted by professional teams and Court. He knew that Kevin had gotten matching tattoos with Riko, which Alex still thought was stupid. He hadn’t seen Kevin since the day he, Kevin, and Riko watched his father tear someone limb from limb in one of the towers of Castle Evermore. That night his mother took him and they had been running ever since.

\--

Alex was just about to talk out the door when his mother’s voice stopped him. He had been avoiding her the last couple weeks, ever since he had went out of his way to befriend Andrew. Making friends was strictly against the rules, and he knew that the minute she found out they would be gone for good.

                “Alex, you should start spreading around the story to your teachers that your grandmother is very sick and we have to move back to San Jose to take care of her very soon, so they don’t ask questions when you don’t show up.”

And just like that, the little bubble that Alex had been living in had popped. He knew they wouldn’t stay, but there was still that hope.

Thinking quickly, he said, “Shouldn’t we, um,” he hesitated, “don’t you think we should stay here until Thanksgiving Break? It would, um, give us more time to prepare and stuff.”

                “More time to…prepare and stuff,” Caroline responded unimpressed and arching her eyebrow.

                “Yeah, you know, more time to tell the school why we’re leaving and stuff.”

At this his mother grabbed his face, forcing him to look her in the eye. She searched his gaze, for what he didn’t know, but after a few seconds she nodded and let go of him.

                “Okay, Abram. We’ll stay until Thanksgiving Break, and then we leave.”

Alex nodded, not having it in him to say anything.

It was November 1st, so he still had a few weeks here in Oakland. He had no plans to squander what little time he had left.

\---

The school day passed quickly, and all through the day Andrew had been, odd. While Andrew never talked much, he did still talk to Alex, and even if he wasn’t Alex could always read exactly what was written in his face. But today, nothing. Andrew had barely acknowledged Alex all day, and Alex didn’t like it one bit.

When the final bell rang to signal the end of the day Alex kept right where he was. Typically, Alex was the first one out the door as soon as the clock it 3pm, but he wanted to know what was up with Andrew, so he was staying.

Andrew merely glanced over when he noticed that Alex hadn’t left straight away, but otherwise ignored him. After putting his books in his bag, Andrew stood up to leave. Alex then followed Andrew out the door and kept following him. Andrew didn’t move to acknowledge his presence until they had stopped at his locker.

                “What.”

Alex couldn’t tell if that was a question or not, but answered like it was, “You’ve been off today,” then he thought about it, “Well, you’ve been off the past week or so. So, I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” he shrugged playing it off as not a big deal, but pleased when Andrew gave him his attention.

                “Why do you care?”

                “I just do.” And that was thing. Alex didn’t actually know why he cared so much, he just knew that he _did_ care. It gave him an odd swirling feeling in his gut. _Weird_.

Andrew just stared at him, not saying anything before seeming to weigh his options and eventually settling on, “Nothing’s wrong.”

Alex decided not to press the issue, even though it was clear by the look on Andrew’s face that something was in fact, wrong. So, Alex decided on a new approach.

                “Are you doing anything right now?”

                “Why.”

                “I’ll tell you once you agree to come with me somewhere,” Alex told him.

Andrew seemed resigned to his fate at this point, knowing that Alex wouldn’t let this drop if he said no.

                “Fine.”

                “Okay, just put your stuff away and follow me. We have to go to the store first.”

Andrew did as he was told and followed Alex out of the school.

They had been walking for about 10 minutes before a Target came into view. While waiting to cross the street Andrew turned to face Alex and before he could say anything Alex told him, “Just wait.”

When the light finally turned green, they crossed the street and walked into Target. Alex grabbed a cart and led Andrew towards the back of the store where the giant sign said ‘Candy’. When he turned to look at Andrew, Andrew looked back unimpressed.

                “Halloween was yesterday.”

                “Congratulations, you know the date. Which means you should know that today means all the Halloween candy is on sale,” and smiling brightly at his friend and gesturing towards the stacks of on sale candy, Alex said, “Which also means I am going to buy you all the candy you want.”

Andrew probably hadn’t been expecting that, if the look of shock and surprise that flittered across his face was anything to go by. Then Andrew’s face turned the slightest shade of pink and he smiled slightly at Alex and nodded, and Alex felt like a bunch of bats had started a riot in his stomach.

 Alex laughed when Andrew became engrossed in the task of filling the entire cart with as much candy as it could possibly hold.

After racking up a truly impressive bill-which Alex was going to have to keep a secret from his mother because if she found out he had spent that much money on candy, then well it wouldn’t be pretty-he led Andrew to a small park a block away since it was still relatively warm out. Alex led him to a small secluded table and dropped his duffel on the seat next to him, sprawling onto the seat. Alex had found this park just last week on one of his daily runs. He tended to switch routes everyday so he could find all the ways to best get around the area quick.

Andrew didn’t seem phased, instead opening up the first bag of candy as soon as he sat down.

Once Andrew had a decent pile of trash in front of him, Alex figured it would be the best time to ask.

                “So, are you going to tell me what’s wrong?

At this Andrew gave him furious look, but when he blinked he was back to looking emotionless. Andrew placed his candy on the table and touched his own wrist briefly, before settling his hands on either side of him. Looking just to the left of Alex’s face Andrew said,

                “Truth for truth.”

At this Alex turned his head to the side in question and waited for Andrew to continue.

                “I’ll answer. But only if you tell me who you’re hiding from.”

At this Alex flinched hard, his wrist hitting the table. Andrew finally looked at Alex and sat there calmly while he waited for Alex to get himself under control.

                “What makes you think that I’m hiding from anyone?” Alex asked instead. At that Andrew just gave him a dry look as if to say, _‘really?’_

                “From what I’ve seen so far, you’re probably in Witness Protection. So? Is it the mob or something?”

Alex nodded, “Or something.”

Andrew leaned over and pinched Alex’s chin between his fingers, forcing Alex to look him in the eyes. Whatever he saw there made him nod and release him. Andrew leaned back in his chair. After a few seconds he looked away from Alex and seemed to be staring at nothing and said,

                “My foster brother came home about 2 weeks ago.”

Andrew stopped and starting touching his wrists again, as if trying to settle himself before he could continue. Alex waited patiently, not liking where this was going.

                “My foster brother doesn’t understand the meaning of consent.”

The meaning of this kind of statement took a few seconds to sink in. Then Alex was pissed. Andrew didn’t deserve that. Alex knew Andrew wouldn’t welcome any kind of sympathy, so he just nodded and calmly said,

                “Do you want me to kill him?” It wouldn’t be the first time that Alex had resorted to killing, but it would be the first time he would take everything his father had taught him as a kid and make it last.

Andrew obviously hadn’t been expecting that, if the way he whipped his head back to look at Alex. He froze for a second when he realized that Alex was being serious. Andrew furrowed his brow, as if trying to figure out a way to respond. He seemed to weigh his answers but eventually said, “No.”

Alex was confused by this and let his confusion be shown when he asked him why not.

                “Because, Cass is still a good mom. She loves her son and she’d be devastated if anything happened to him. I couldn’t do that to her.”

                “Andrew-“

                “No.” Andrew said, letting a bit of heat creep into his voice.

                “Okay, Andrew. I won’t make you talk about it if you don’t want to. But,” Alex thought for a moment, wondering if Andrew would even care but had to say, “You deserve better.”

Andrew just scoffed, and Alex let it drop.

They stayed at the park for a few more hours, and when the sun was starting to go down they parted ways, but not before Alex said, “Stay safe Andrew.”

Andrew stopped where he was and just stared at Alex, as if trying to figure him out, but eventually just nodded and went on his way home. Alex watched as Andrew walked away and turned out of view, not understanding the swooping feeling he had in his stomach. Lifting his duffle to drape it across his chest, Alex starting the walk back to the apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> up next: a wild aaron appears????????!!!!!!!  
> make sure to leave some kudos and comments! <3


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello everyone! heres another chapter with neil/alex pov! It's been so weird writing this and getting back into this kind of writing because straight up, for the past three years everything i've written has been solely within academia, and lbr that style of writing is ALOT different than writing fiction.  
> also, i've really enjoyed reading all of your comments and if i don't respond it's probably because i am an awkward gremlin but they make me squeal and blush so much I LOVE THEM<3  
> as always, ENJOY!

Over the next few days Alex felt conflicted over what to do with Andrew. He tried to go about his days normally, but whenever he was with Andrew, he was just angry and confused. On one hand he wanted to kill Drake to make sure he couldn’t lay a hand on his friend ever again, but on the other, he was already told not to do anything, and he had to respect Andrew’s choice.

During lunch one day, while they were on the roof, as per usual, Alex had tried laying down but after squirming around in an effort to get comfortable, Andrew had called him an idiot and told him to put his head his in his lap. Alex wasn’t sure how Andrew was okay with Alex sitting so, well, _close_ , but Andrew had said it was fine, so Alex decided it must be alright. After finding a comfortable position Alex stared up at Andrew smoking and looking out at the horizon.

Alex was trying to think of a way to bring up what Andrew had told him the other day, and he knew Andrew didn’t want to talk about it, but Alex just-he _needed_ to understand why. Why would Andrew willingly stay? Was Cass really worth that much pain and suffering?

Andrew must have been able to read the look on his face because he leveled Alex with a dirty look.

                “What.”

                “It’s just-” he broke off, trying to think of a way to word it, “I don’t understand.”

Alex didn’t need to say exactly what he didn’t understand.

                “I never asked you to understand.”

                “I want to play another round,” Alex told him, “Why would you stay?”

                “What would you give me?” Andrew asked, glancing at Alex.

                “What do you want?”

                “Take out your contacts,” Andrew told him.

Alex flinched. He hated it that Andrew knew exactly what to say to get a reaction out of him. He hated taking out his contacts, hated that he had his father’s eyes, hated that they forever marked him as the Butcher’s son.

Andrew didn’t say anything about Alex’s reaction, he didn’t even look at him.

                “Okay,” Alex said, barely a whisper, before sitting up to take them out. He always made sure to carry around an extra pair, but he still felt naked without them. Vulnerable.

Andrew turned to face Alex, sitting right in front of him. He grabbed his chin, forcing Alex to make eye contact with him. They stayed like that, just looking at each other, observing.

Alex had never shared something like this with anyone, he was exposing one of his truths, something he had kept closely guarded for years. It was exhilarating, being known.

After Andrew had looked his fill, he released Alex, but still looking at him said,

                “Drake is leaving in February. He’s being deployed with the Army.”

 _Oh_. “You’re trying to outlast him.”

                “That’s the idea,” Andrew said in a monotone, lifting two fingers to his head in a salute.

Alex wanted to know more, but decided not to push Andrew any further than he already had, so he simply nodded, before reaching into his back pocket to put his spare contacts back in. They spent the rest of their lunch period in a comfortable silence, just exchanging cigarettes, and if, whenever Alex glanced at Andrew he felt something stirring in the pit of his stomach? He just pushed it aside to worry about later.

\---

The next week passed in a blur for Alex. Before coming to Oakland he had spent every day on a knife edge, just waiting for something to happen, but now? Now he was comfortable. He had a routine; he would wake up after his mother had already left for work, eat breakfast, go to school and hang out with Andrew, he would come home and go for a run around the neighborhood, go to sleep, rise rinse repeat. For someone who had spent a good portion of his life on the run, Alex found the monotony of the day-to-day, nice. Relaxing.

One day, when he went to the roof during his lunch hour, he found Andrew already there, which, while not an unusual occurrence, Andrew was never surrounded by a pile of books. 

Andrew hadn’t paid him any mind when he arrived, so when Alex sat down he plucked the book out of Andrew’s hand to read the title, ignoring the glare that was sent his way.

                “Why are you reading _The Intermediate Guide to German_?” Alex asked when he realized that it wasn’t the textbook they needed for the class. Then he saw that the books that stationed next to Andrew were all in German as well. He raised an eyebrow at Andrew while waiting for him to answer.

                “Because, _idiot_ , you’re going to help me learn German.”

At this Alex was confused, because from what he had picked up over the past two months or so, Andrew was getting straight As in German, he didn’t need any help. When he told Andrew this, he got that look again, the one that told him Andrew thought he was an idiot. _Ah._

                “There’s a difference between learning a language in the classroom, and being able to speak it fluently,” Andrew gave him a dry look, probably mentally calling him an idiot, “You speak it differently than anyone else, like a native. So, I want you to teach me.”

Alex didn’t know what to say to that. He had learned how to speak German the way he did, because his mother had literally beaten it into him. Andrew was right though, you couldn’t learn to speak a language fluently in a classroom. It was something you did through immersion.

Alex had spent almost a year, moving around Germany with his mother, and he learned quickly that the best way to get by unnoticed was by speaking it like he had been born and raised in Germany. 

                “And what do I get in exchange?” Alex asked, because if he was going to help Andrew with speaking a new language, he wanted something out of it.

                “I’ll do that English essay, the one you’ve been putting off,” Andrew responded, as if he was expected Alex to say that.

And okay, yes. Alex _was_ putting off writing the essay, but he just couldn’t see the point. Because really, what was the point of writing a six page paper on some book that he couldn’t care less about? It’s not like the answer would ever help him in life. It was stupid, tedious, and he saw no point to doing it, and he had complained to Andrew every day during class about it.

                “Deal.”

And so for the next few days, every day during lunch Alex would help Andrew with his German, correcting his pronunciation and teaching him better ways to phrase things.

\---

It was the middle of November when things started to change, Andrew was becoming a little more distant, not letting Alex touch him or get that close. At first Alex didn’t really understand it, but then Andrew wasn’t at school on Friday. That’s when he got worried, because Andrew never missed school.

The entire day felt off without Andrew right by his side. As the day dragged on, Alex started thinking the worst had happened, but the more he told himself that Andrew was fine, the more he worried.

_What if something terrible happened?_

So directly after school, Alex made his way to the local library a few blocks away from school. From everything that Andrew had told him, he knew the general area that Andrew lived in, and a quick internet search revealed exactly where Cass and Richard Spear lived on Spruce Street, just a few minutes’ walk from the high school. With this new information, Alex started the walk over.

On the walk over, Alex kept telling himself that Andrew was fine, but he couldn’t help but think of the worst. Alex had seen enough of the world to know to always expect the worst.

By the time he found the house, he almost turned and walked away. He knew that Andrew probably wouldn’t like the fact that Alex had come here, but he just had to know for sure that his friend was alright. So with that in mind he rang the doorbell and waited.

He went to ring the doorbell again, when an older woman opened the door, and looked at him with confusion plain on her face.

                “Oh, hello dear. Are you here for Drake? He just stepped out a bit ago with some friends,” she said. Alex looked her over, and realized that this must be Cass. The woman Andrew was putting himself through hell to stay with. She didn’t look like much, with a plain face and dull brown hair, prematurely streaked with grey. Alex couldn’t help but dislike her on sight.

                “No I’m not here for Drake” he couldn’t believe the obvious love that was shining through this woman’s eyes when she just mentioned her son. How could she not know her son was a monster? “I’m Alex, Andrew wasn’t in school today so I came to give him his homework,” he told her. He didn’t really, he hadn’t paid attention in class all day, too worried about Andrew, but figured that this would be the best way to get Cass to let him in the house to see him. She looked surprised at that, as if she was shocked Andrew just might have a friend, but then she smiled at him.

                “Oh, well come on in,” she said opening the door wider and gesturing him inside. Alex nodded and lifted his duffle closer to himself, and walked in.

                She closed the door once Alex was inside and faced him. He waited for her to say something, but when she didn’t he let his impatience show.

“Is Andrew here or-?”

“Oh, sorry, silly me,” and looking towards the stairs said, “He’s upstairs in his room. I can go see if he’s awake, but he was sleeping when I checked in on him a few minutes ago.”

“That’s fine. I’ll just go see for myself.” And with that he turned and walked up the stairs before Cass could respond.

When he got upstairs, he didn’t know which door was Andrew’s so he just took a guess that his door was the only one fully closed at the moment.

Alex knocked lightly before saying, “Andrew? It’s Alex, you in there?” When he didn’t get an answer, he thought _fuck it_ , and opened the door. He knew he shouldn’t intrude, but he just-he had to know that Andrew was alright.

When he opened the door he saw that Andrew was sitting up in his bed, as if about to get up. Alex wasn’t used to Andrew not wearing a bunch of layers that left his arms covered, and so got distracted at the sight of his bear arms and shoulders.

But then he looked a bit further down and froze. They both had frozen, not sure what to do, Andrew not having expected Alex to be here, and Alex because of what was covering Andrew’s wrists.

There were fresh cuts, overlaid by older scars, some barely healed and some pink and inflamed. Alex knew a lot about scars, his body being covered in them. But not one of his scars were self-inflicted.

Andrew finally seemed to gain his bearings because he snapped at Alex, “Close the fucking door.”

Alex quickly complied but couldn’t stop staring, before finding his voice.

                “What, Andrew. Andrew, what-” he couldn’t voice it. Alex felt like crying, it was then that he realized how much he actually cared for Andrew, because in that moment he felt like burning the world, and slicing up anyone who had ever laid a finger on Andrew.

Andrew however glared darkly at Alex, and leaned down off the bed to put on a long sleeved shirt that was on the floor. “Fuck off. Why are you here?” He said as he put his shirt on.

Alex swallowed, not knowing what to say. He knew Andrew wouldn’t appreciate Alex bring up the cuts, so he told himself to respect that, and forced his gaze up to meet Andrews.

                “You weren’t at school, I just wanted to make sure you were alright.”

Andrew seemed to soften a bit at that and told him nonchalantly, “I’m fine, just didn’t feel like going to school.”

Alex knew this was probably a lie, but nodded anyway, knowing if Andrew wanted to talk about it he would.

                “Ok, um, do you want me to go or-?”

                “You can stay.”

So, Alex stayed. He sat down in the beanbag chair next to Andrew’s bed while Andrew told him about the book he was reading, which Alex didn’t get, but enjoyed listening to Andrew talk about nonetheless. They were discussing German when Cass walked in without so much as knocking. Alex flinched at her obvious intrusion, but Andrew didn’t seem surprised.

Cass, however, seemed surprised. _Jesus, she’s the one who just waltzed in without knocking. What did she expect to find?_ Alex wanted to tell her what he thought of her, but knew Andrew would skin him alive for it.

                “Oh, Andrew. Food’s almost done, and I just wanted to know if your friend would like to stay for dinner?”

Andrew simply turned to Alex, mentally asking him what he wanted. Alex did want to stay, a bit, just so he could have some more time with Andrew, but knew he wouldn’t be able to sit for an entire dinner with Cass so he shook his head.                             

                “Actually, I have to get going. My mother is expecting me home soon.” He explained to Cass, hoping she would go away.

                “Oh, alright. Well, Andrew dinner’s done when you’re ready to eat, alright sweetheart?”

Andrew simply nodded at her, and with that Cass walked out of the door, leaving the door open.

Alex turned to Andrew when he heard Cass had made it downstairs and said, “I don’t like her.”

Andrew shot him a look. “Didn’t ask.”

Andrew was walking Alex downstairs, but before they descended, Alex took a deep breath and stopped Andrew. “Andrew, just so you know, my offer is still on the table.” He didn’t elaborate about which offer, but Andrew knew what he was talking about.

Andrew shook his head. “I can handle it.”

Alex went to grab Andrew’s arm, before deciding against it, knowing he didn’t like being touched. “But that’s the thing,” he pointed out, “You shouldn’t have to.” And with that Alex turned to go downstairs, with Andrew following closely behind.

As Alex was walking out the front door, he stopped and turned back to Andrew again. Andrew crossed his arms over his chest, and Alex took a moment, looking at how his biceps bulged in the tight shirt. Alex pushed aside the weird sensation in his stomach, telling himself it was probably something he ate.

Then he looked Andrew in the eye and said, “Just, stay safe, alright?”

Andrew simply nodded, then closed the door in Alex’s face.

\---

Alex spent most of that weekend running, trying to take his mind off of Andrew. He had been avoiding his mother in the meantime, because he knew that if she took one look at the emotions he couldn’t keep from showing on his face, she would force them to leave right away.

He knew by now just how attached he had become to Andrew, and how furious his mother would be if she knew. _This_ is what his mother had warned him against for years. That they couldn’t get attached. It was already too late though, and Alex knew that when he left it just might kill a piece inside himself.   Alex hoped that his friend knew just how serious was. How all he’d have to do was ask, and he would kill Drake.

When Alex turned the corner, however, he stopped dead in his tracks, because just across the street was Andrew. Which was odd, because Alex was a good hours run from where Andrew lived, and he had already listened to Andrew complain-at length-about how running and jogging, and every variation of, was stupid and pointless. He was just about to cross the street to see why he was here, when he caught sight of a police officer approaching Andrew.

At this Alex was even more confused, so taking care to be quiet he tried to get closer until he could hear what they were saying.

                “Andrew! I haven’t seen you in a while, how are you doing with the new placement?”

Andrew had looked increasingly confused the more the officer talked, and right before he opened his mouth to speak, Alex knew that something was really wrong, because _this wasn’t Andrew_.

Not-Andrew confirmed this by saying, sounding pissed off, “Look, I don’t know who the fuck you are, but I’m not Andrew.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm pretty sure i've decided where i want to end this portion of the series, but I do have plans to continue on!!  
> i don't actually know how i feel about this chapter, because halfway through writing it grew a mind of its own??? so please leave kudos/comments and let me know what you think!! (& because they're seriously my life force and i love them<3<3


	9. Chapter 9

Just as Not-Andrew confirmed he was not, in fact, Andrew, a car pulled up next to him and a woman screamed out the rolled down window, “Aaron, hurry the fuck up! I don’t have all day to just wait around!”

Alex didn’t know what the fuck was happening because this was not how he had imagined his day would turn out. Not-Andrew said something to the cop and climbed into the woman’s car and the officer leaned down to talk with her. From this distance, Alex couldn’t hear what the officer what was being said but from what he saw it was a short conversation.  The cop took out a pad and wrote something down and handed it to the woman. He then seemed to direct something to Not-Andrew and nodded when the kid responded. When the car drove off, Alex turned in the other direction and ran back to his apartment.

By the time Alex got home he was drenched in sweat and his mind was racing. He knew he was going to have to tell Andrew about what he saw, but seriously, how do you tell someone they have some long lost twin?

After a quick shower, Alex ate some toast with butter and a banana, then decided he might as well get started on some homework due the next day. When he heard his mother come home from work a few hours later he tilted his head in acknowledgment, but otherwise said nothing. Which, honestly, was par for the course for them. Alex did love his mother, and he knew his mother loved him, but after 6 years of being attached at the hip in order to survive, there wasn’t much left to say to each other, so most of the time they didn’t talk, only communicating in facial expressions and body language.

After he finished his math packet, Alex went to bed, thinking about what he was going to say to Andrew when he saw him tomorrow.

\---

Alex had kept quiet throughout the first half of school, and he kept shooting glances at Andrew. By this point Andrew had caught on and looked at Alex like he was crazy and being weird. Which, yes Alex will concede that he is probably acting a bit weird, but now that he could pay attention to Andrew face, he saw just how similar Not-Andrew was to him. While Not-Andrew had looked pissed off and was every inch a sulky teenager, Andrew looked like he couldn’t care less about anything and everyone. _And_ , Alex thought, _Andrew does have a lot more muscle than Not-Andrew._

Alex shook his head as if to physically clear that thought from his head, and gave Andrew a shaky smile when he saw the look his friend was giving him.

Later, when the bell rang to signal the start of their lunch period, Alex ran up to the roof to wait for Andrew.  

Alex messed around with the zipper of his bag when he heard Andrew come through the door. He didn’t move to look at him until Andrew sat down facing him.

                “What.”

Not knowing what to say, Alex responded, “What, what?”

Andrew growled and gestured to him, “You’re being fucking weird, just-,” he broke off.

At this Alex turned to face him and saw that Andrew was clutching his wrists to himself and said, not looking at Alex, “Look, if this is about the shit you saw,”

 _Oh_ , _he thinks I’m being weird about the-._ Alex couldn’t even finish the thought because it was still painful to think about Andrew hurting himself, and with the look on his face he knew that Andrew thought Alex was thinking less of him.

“Andrew,” he reached, stopping short of touching his hand until Andrew nodded his consent, “This isn’t about that, you told me you didn’t want to talk about it, so we won’t.”

Andrew looked at him, not really believing him, but nodded again.

                “Then why’re being so fucking weird today?” He spat out.

Alex looked off to the side before answering, not knowing how Andrew would react.

                “What do you know about your birth family?”

Alex focused on Andrew’s face when he felt his friend flinch just slightly and brushed off Alex’s hand from his.

“My last names Doe, I don’t fucking know a thing about whoever abandoned me.” He said it with such finality, no emotion clouding his voice, but Alex could tell, from the look in his eye that Andrew didn’t want to talk about this.

“Okay, so. Here’s the thing.” Alex stopped, not really knowing how to proceed. Andrew must have gotten impatient with him because he snapped, “What thing?”

Alex took a deep breath before explaining what he saw yesterday. How he was out jogging and stopped when he saw someone who looked like Andrew, but before he could a cop came up to the kid thinking he was Andrew, which is when Alex realized it was not, in fact, Andrew.

When Alex finished explaining he asked Andrew seemed to shut down, then he asked Alex if he knew the other guy’s name.

                “Um, yeah, I think the woman said his name was Aaron?”

Then Andrew said, with disbelieve clear in his voice, “I have a brother. _A brother_.”

Alex smiled at him, “I’d say probably a twin, from how much he looked like you.”

Andrew started laughing, with Alex joining in, when Andrew said, “ _This is so fucked up.”_

                “Yeah, it is. But is it a good thing?”

Andrew stopped laughing at that and furrowed his brows, thinking. Eventually he hesitantly said, “I don’t know.”

Alex decided to leave it at that, but for the rest of the day, when he looked over at his friend, Andrew seemed deep in thought.

\---

Andrew wasn’t in school the next two days, and Alex was didn’t know what to think. What he did know was that he couldn’t go to the Spear house to make sure Andrew was okay, because if his friend wasn’t, Alex wouldn’t hesitate in killing someone.

Andrew did come back to school on Thursday, and Alex was relieved when he saw that, Andrew looked exhausted, and the black circles under his eyes wasn’t helping. It looked like he hadn’t slept since Alex last saw him.

Alex wanted to press Andrew all day about his absence, but whenever he went to open his mouth Andrew glared at him. Alex took the hint.

During lunch Alex made a point to get to the roof before Andrew. Ten minutes later, when he heard the door open, Alex jumped up and spun around to look at Andrew. He didn’t move, he just waited until Andrew shut the door and walked over to him.

“Andrew, what happened? Are you alright?”

Andrew ignored the questions and dropped his bag on the concrete, before carefully sitting down. Alex didn’t miss the slight wince, but he simply sat down next to his friend.

“That woman you said you saw with Aaron, it was my birth mom. She called Cass, explained what happened. She gave me up, but kept him.”

Alex didn’t know what to say to that, so instead he lifted his hand over Andrews, and when Andrew nodded, he intertwined their fingers together.

“Aaron wants to meet me.” He didn’t sound very happy about that, so Alex asked him if he wanted to meet him.

“No. I-I can’t,” Andrew gripped Alex’s hand tighter before continuing, “Drake, he said that he’s always wanted to try twins. I can’t let that happen to someone else.”

Alex could feel his heart breaking, Andrew looked broken, defeated. And he had no idea what he was supposed to do. So he sat there in silence with Andrew gripping his hand.

Before lunch was about to be over Andrew finally looked at Alex. He seemed determined.

“When you run, take me with you.”

At that Alex froze. Just like that everything came crashing down around him, because just this morning his mother had made it a point to tell him they would be leaving in on Thursday-the start of Thanksgiving break. He only had one more day left with Andrew, here. And as much as he wanted, he knew he couldn’t bring Andrew with him. So Alex told him the truth, or most of it anyway.

“I can’t,” Alex could hear his voice break, wishing this could end differently, “it’s-Andrew, I can’t do that do you. If they found you, they would kill you, Andrew-,”

Before Alex could explain, could tell Andrew _why_ , Andrew pulled his hand from his and stood up, and grapping his bag, said, “I knew you were too good to be true.”

And just like that, Alex watched Andrew walk out the door, slamming the door shut behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes, Alex does refer to Aaron as 'Not-Andrew' because i maintain that Neil is a catty bitch 100% of the time and would totally call him that to piss him off.  
> there's one more chapter left that i should have up in a few days??? maybe tomorrow maybe next week, who knows  
> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes, some of the lines are taken from the books, mostly because the books are amazing and I couldn't NOT include them. so credit goes to the amazing nora sakavic!!   
> un-beta'd as usual so, all mistakes are completely my own! if you do see a mistake leave a comment & let me know!! <3

By the time Alex got home his mind was still reeling from his conversation with Andrew. After lunch he had tried to explain to Andrew, but Andrew had just completely ignored him, acting as though Alex didn’t exist.

There was still so much he had wanted to say to Andrew but there just wasn’t even time. His mom had quit her job last week, so she was already home when Alex got there, and she had told Alex that they would be leaving right after school today. For the first time in his life, Alex had wanted to argue with his mother, tell her that he actually wanted to stay, because he did. He wanted to stay, he wanted to make sure that Andrew was safe, and he just-he _cared,_ and he didn’t really know how to handle it. If he had more time he could…but he didn’t. They would be leaving in a few days, and tomorrow was the last day Alex Lewis would live, and it would be the last time he saw Andrew. With that, Alex went to bed, determined to at least talk to Andrew one last time tomorrow.

\---

The next day at school, Andrew was still ignoring Alex. Alex had tried all morning to get his attention, and during 2nd period, had even resorted to throwing bits of paper at Andrew, but still Andrew didn’t even budge. It wasn’t until the teacher told him to knock it off and pay attention that he thought he caught Andrew suppressing a small smile, well a twitch, but still it counted.

Since he didn’t share class with Andrew right before lunch, Alex decided to skip it. He then hid in a small alcove next to Andrew’s class, and waiting for Andrew to walk out when class was over. Which, yes, Alex was aware that it was a bit much, but desperate times call for desperate measures and all that crap.

Alex startled a bit when the bell rang to signal the end of class, but as soon as it he watched the door to the classroom and waiting until Andrew walked out. Andrew was one of the last ones out of class and seemed intent on ignoring everyone around him, looking hunched into himself, with even darker circles under his eyes than yesterday.

“ _Andrew!”_ Alex called out in the noisy and crowded hallway, hoping that Andrew could even hear him. He breathed out a sigh of relieve when Andrew stopped in his tracks and turned to see Alex coming up to him. His face was impassive and gave nothing away, so Alex had no idea what Andrew was thinking, but he was just glad that he was at least _looking_ at him.

“Andrew, can we talk?” he said, almost begging. It took a few seconds for Andrew to say anything, but before Alex was about to resign himself to his friend ignoring him, Andrew said, “Okay”, quietly. Resigned almost.

With that he caught Alex’s sleeve in his hand and steered him around the crowded hallway, leading them to the roof.  

Andrew didn’t let go of his sleeve until they got onto the roof. Once they sat down facing the skyline Andrew grabbed ahold of Alex’s hand and squeezed, just a bit too tightly, almost as if he was anchoring himself. Alex squeezed back, silently telling Andrew, ’ _I’m here.’_

They sat like that, taking silent comfort in each other for a while until Alex knew that he had to say something, _anything._

“Andrew, I’m sorry.” _For having to leave you here, for not staying, for lying._

“Sorry for what? You aren’t real.”

“I’m not a hallucination,” Alex said, confused.

“You are a pipe dream,” Andrew said, squeezing tight his hand tight enough to hurt. “I thought I knew better.”

_‘So did I._ ’ Alex wanted to say, looking at Andrew. But he knew he might as well of been a hallucination, a ghost. There one minute gone the next. Instead, Alex gave Andrew a truth.

“Abram,” Alex said. Andrew looked over at Alex, his expression blank, waiting for him to continue. “I’m named after my father, but Abram is my middle name; it’s the only name that matters.”

“Abram,” Andrew said, testing the name out. Alex felt a shiver down his spine at the sound of his name- _that_ name-in Andrew’s mouth. “I’m never going to let Drake touch my brother.” 

Alex didn’t ask how Andrew was going to accomplish that, but nodded anyway, knowing that Andrew was smart, that he if he said it wasn’t going to happen, then it just wasn’t going to happen. They didn’t talk for a long time after that, Alex just sat there staring at the side of Andrew’s face, knowing it could be the last time he ever saw his friend.

“Staring,” Andrew said staring back, and breaking Alex out of his daze. Alex smiled softly at him, and he saw Andrew seem to debate something with himself before he asked,

“Yes or no?”

Alex didn’t quite know what he was agreeing to, but was willing to find out.

“Yes.” With that, Andrew caught Alex’s face in his hands and leaned in.

Alex had never kissed or been kissed. From everything he’d seen he always thought it was something he wouldn’t ever want or need, and he knew if he did the punishment wouldn’t be worth it if his mother found out.

But this. This was _something_.  

 Andrew kissed him like this was a fight with their lives on the line, like the world stopped and started with Alex’s mouth. Alex he gripped the edges of Andrew’s sleeve, twisting the cotton fabric in his finger, losing himself in Andrew. Alex never wanted it to end, but it was over too quickly, and his heart stuttered in his chest when Andrew leaned back staring at Alex straight in the eye, still holding onto his face.

Then Andrew did something Alex had rarely seen him do in the months he’d known him. He honest to god, smiled, his entire face softening as he looked at Alex. Alex found himself smiling back, still holding onto Andrew.

Alex rested his forehead against Andrews, and intertwined their fingers together, both just breathing the other in, not wanting to break the moment. The second they moved, Alex knew it would be the end, and he wanted to hold onto it for as long as possible, to milk this moment for all that it was worth.

 Finally, Alex pulled back.

“We should, um. Class, we have to, yup.” ‘ _And my brain is fried.’_ It was then that he realized his mother had been right, things like this were _dangerous_.

Andrew looked amused but resigned at Alex’s stammering.

“Alright,” Andrew said, standing up, “Let’s go.”

Alex stared as Andrew starting towards to door, and didn’t realize he wasn’t moving until Andrew turned around and said, “Come on.”

Alex scrambled up to following saying, “Right, yes. Alright.”

The only thought going through Alex’s head as they walked side by side to class was

_I wish I could stay._

\---

Alex found himself not being able to concentrate all throughout his afternoon classes, much to Andrew’s amusement. Every time a teacher told Alex to pay attention, he saw Andrew suppressing a small smile. ‘ _I did that, holy shit.’_

They didn’t say anything to each other all day, aside from lingering looks. But when the day finally ended, Alex followed Andrew to his locker.

Alex leaned against the locker next to Andrew and said, “Hey.” To which Andrew just raised an eyebrow as if calling Alex an idiot, which was a pretty common expression by this point.

There was still so much Alex wanted to tell him, but when he opened his mouth, he found nothing came out. He wanted to tell Andrew the truth, but knew he couldn’t risk Andrew’s safety like that. Instead, Alex took a breath before saying looking away,

“Schools out until Monday.” He cut himself off, trying to think of the right words. Looking around to see that the hallways were pretty clear and nobody was watching them, Alex lifted his hand towards Andrew’s face. Andrew stared impassively as Alex left his hand hovering, waiting for Andrew. Andrew nodded, and Alex gently touched his friends face, and looking straight at him told him, “Stay safe.”

Andrew furrowed his brows at this, slightly confused, but nodded in agreement.

Alex pulled his hand away and smiled at Andrew, trying to memorize his face. Trying to savor this moment, knowing it couldn’t last, knowing Alex Lewis would be dead soon enough. He wanted to tell Andrew that he goodbye, but knew he couldn’t. Alex watched as Andrew walked out the door, after telling Alex that Cass was expecting him.

Alex took a few seconds to breath before leaving the school. He was disappointed in knowing that he wouldn’t see Andrew again, but satisfied to know that a piece of him would always be with his friend.

As he walked out the doors of the school, Abram knew that by this time tomorrow, Alex Lewis would be dead, and he would be far away from this place; this wonderful place where he found _something_.

Walking home, Abram took a moment to clear his head. Deciding that once he left, he would have to put Andrew from his mind, that he couldn’t afford the distraction of thinking about him. But just for a second, he let himself hope that somehow Andrew would be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and THAT ALL FOLKS! ...  
> well, of part 1. I do have 2 more parts planned/plotted out plus some extras so!!!! I am def planning on continuing!!!  
> and I love reading all the amazing comments and feedback that ya'll give, it's seriously beautiful<3  
> This was the first ever fanfic that i've done and I am so excited that people have actually liked it so far!!

**Author's Note:**

> next up: Andrew pov!


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